Men can be as mysterious and complicated as women sometimes. This is why some ladies are still trying to figure out why their men have become withdrawn, he has stopped calling or picking up calls, he seems emotionally distant, or he behaves angrily towards them for no apparent reason. when asked why he has changed, the response they get is ‘ I NEED SPACE‘.
In this article I would like to share the common reasons why most men feel they need space.
1. Stress. Men have a tendency of withdrawing from everyone when they are experiencing stress due to work or other things. The people around them (including their spouse) may feel that they have done something wrong when in fact the man is trying to figure out a solution to a stressful life event. In this case, a woman needs to be understanding and to give him time to think and resolve his issues.
2. Your love of money: this puts some men under pressure, especially when every time you meet up with him you demand for something. It makes some men think that you love them for money and not for who they really are. It also causes some to steal so as to meet your demands. So to avoid further problems they resort to withdrawing from you either permanently or temporarily.
3. You are clingy: as with women, men don’t like clingy women. What does he mean? You may ask.
Well, this means that you are always contacting him, trying to find out where he is, you are jealous whenever you see him with the member of the opposite sex, you always want to be with him and don’t give him time to be with their friends just to mention a few. These suffocate some men, something which makes them want a breathing space.
4. They didn’t date/marry you because of love: Some men date in order to forget about their ex or to cope with a disappointment. However, when they are healed from that, they tend to start thinking about starting a life with someone else they truly love other than you.
5. You cheated on him. As I explained in my previous article, there is nothing that breaks someone’s trust like cheating as it makes him suspicious of you and robs him of peace. So the best thing he thinks of doing is leaving you or giving him space as some men diplomatically put it.
6. You make him feel insecure: This point is closely link to the previous one. You may be doing things that make him feel insecure, such as communicating with your ex boy friends or husbands. The other thing could be that you seem like an easy goer to him who is always trying to capture the attention of different men. Some men who are serious to develop a relationship with someone usually look for security. As such, your attitude may correctly or erroneously send them a signal that you are not the right one for them.
7. You are argumentative: What most men don’t like is arguing with them. They always like to feel that they are right. Of course a man can not always be right ,but you need to find a good way of conveying your ideas to him.
The list can go on and on due to the fact that men are different and so are their experiences, something which may explain the different reasons given above.Thus, It’s wise in some situations to give him the space he needs because it gives him time to reflect on what his really needs or something which may be pressing him. In other circumstances, especially if you feel that the reason why he needs space is because you cheated on him, it may be wise to never raise hopes of sharing a future with him or think that things will work out.
Trying to make things right may just push him far away from you. So you need to be open minded during this time. Forgive yourself for the wrong you may have done to him and know that you are just human. God knows you are not perfect and it’s not always your fault when a man behaves in that way.
#God’s grace is sufficient.
Apart from being a mental health practitioner,Mr Farai Mbundire is also a researcher, Write, and and a mental health lecturer.